Today I cried.

I wasn't brave enough to share this, nearly 6 years ago, when I wrote it. We were in the process of moving to Thailand, having sold our home in Georgia, we were living in Michigan with my parents and the kids were 1, 4, and 8.  I was grieving.  Many of you are feeling loss, facing uncertainty, and find yourselves looking back at what was.  Maybe you're struggling to look forward at what will be, because it will be different and uncomfortable.  I hope my story helps you to not feel alone, and more importantly, I pray that God's truth pulls you forward as it did me. 

Max, age 1, got his passport! (He'll be 7 in a few months).

August 2014
Today I found myself focusing on all that I am stepping away from in a few weeks: familiarity and comfort.  We have spent the past 9 months with my family and many adjustments came with that.

It was the longest, coldest winter ever in Michigan and I cried when our van got stuck in the snowy driveway for the third time.  I missed my friends and my church, our grocery stores and the ease of knowing where I could take my kids for fun and educational outings...BUT, our little Mungle family experienced something we've never had before: family living nearby. (The closest our kids have ever lived to family was an 11 hour drive). For the past 9 months we've lived with my parents, 20 minutes from my sister's family, my aunt, uncle, and cousins, and a few hours from my brother and his wife.  For the first time, since we were teenagesrs, my sister could just drop in and visit!

Today we spent most of the day with my sister's family.  She was pregnant when we moved here and now we both have little boys, 8 months apart.  She's watched Max learn to do pretty much everything from grabbing a toy, to crawling, and now walking.  Likewise, every milestone in her son's life happened with us nearby.  So, after a day of swimming and laughing, dinner, and brownies, and pushing our babies in stroller's through the neighborhood, I am sad...knowing that we only have a few more weeks of this until I fly to the other side of the world.

I want to move to Thailand.  I want to love the Lord whole-heartedly and be his hands to serve and love the people there and point them to Christ, the source of love and hope.  I know the promise of Matthew 19:29, but I am sad to leave.

As the kids got ready for bed today, Jack said, "I am a little sad about moving to Thailand."  "Me too," I told him.  He continued, "but I am more excited than sad...I'll probably make friends pretty easily... and get to climb a waterfall."  He made me smile.  We've told the kids that there are adventures in Thailand that you can't have in America.  We've also shared the truth: it won't always be fun, and it will be hard.  We will give up things (sacrifice) in order to serve the Lord there.  Ken and I try to speak the brevity of life into our children and recently we had a big reminder of it.

The day we got the affirmation to move to Thailand, just a few weeks ago, our future co-worker's daughter died.  They had only been in Chiang Mai about 9 weeks when their 6 year old daughter caught a virus.  It was a common virus that occurs all over the world, but in extremely rare cases, it goes to the heart.  (The Lord is using her life to bring others to Christ and the family is suffering with hope and being a light to everyone around them, despite their grief).

Life is a vapor.

God has called us to Thailand and we have been waiting to get there! Before we say hello to fellow workers, church family, and neighbors, we have to say "see ya later" here.  Yes, we will be home to visit, and we will skype and email and text and call, but it isn't the same as snuggling my nephew while laughing with family, or making crafts with my niece and watching the cousins play together...I am just being honest. 

So, where do I go from here?  The Lord keeps bringing this to mind:

• Goodbyes are a result of the fall. 
• Missions is necessary because of the fall.  
• Death is a result of the fall. 

I think it's ok to feel sad about leaving...because this world isn't the way it should be.  One day, missions will no longer be needed because we will be with our Savior! We have eternity awaiting us and one day there will be no more goodbyes or death, PRAISE THE LORD!  But, until then, missions is necessary, and goodbyes are inevitable.

The Lord gave me this verse when I moved to Michigan:

 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, 

for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast

 all the more gladly about my weaknesses, 

so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 

What joy!  I hope that verse encourages you like it continues to challenge and uplift me. 


**Update 2020
His grace is still sufficient.  Life here has changed drastically and often daily as the country faces Covid-19.  So as our weaknesses are exposed, our idols made known, I am praying that the Lord uses this time to change us for His glory.  We are praying for you and America as a whole.  Our weakness is an opportunity, and invitation for Christ's power to rest on us.  In a time or sleep deprevation and anxiety, I can think of no better kind of rest.